Thursday, 24 December 2009

Happy Christmas!!

This is just to say a big thank you for all you support over this very strange year!!!

I promise to be around more after the holidays.

I love you all very much.

Happy Christmas. And I hope the new year brings you everything you desire.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Saturday, 28 November 2009

I'm back! I think!!

I think I might be back. TF promised free chocolate so how could I stay away?
I'm sorry I have been a bad blogger of late. I've kind of got sucked into other things, Face Book and Twitter to name but two. And I have been writing, not my new novel, but still words on page.

So a brief catch up. What has happened to Mrs P recently? Well I MET ROBERT PATTINSON!!!! Sqweeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!! But you all know that.

I have to say that anyone who actually knows me in person will tell you I have changed A LOT over the summer.

As most of you know my lovely dad was diagnosed with cancer on my birthday back in Feb. My 35th will never be forgotten anyway! And as you all know I kind of imploded there for a while. You were all so patient and kind and I do thank you.

I can pin point the change. It was the weekend on my BFF's hen do in early July. It was also the same week that dad went into hospital for his make or break op. I met a great group of girls that weekend who gave me permission to be me, if you know what I mean? I realised that for too long I had been trying to be who everyone else thought I should be. Perfect mother, wife, daughter, and I'd never just been me. Then, for three days, I was just me, and it was bloody fantastic!!

I had also just read the Twilight saga books, as you all know I devoured them at speed! At the hen weekend I found two like minded souls and decided to 'come out' as a Twilighter.

When I met up with the same crowed a few weeks later at Hev's wedding I knew that I wasn't going home as the same person. It was like a cloud had been lifted, revealing the real me.

Some of the changes are subtle. I seem to have gone back to wearing a lot of black, and I paint my nails now (black). And some more...obvious. I've lost nearly two stone, dropped nearly two dress sizes and got two tattoo's. I think getting the tattoo's and losing the weight finally shifted me into my new self.

Again those who have known me a long time will know that I have always wanted a tattoo, but they were the sorts of things other people did. And I have never been happy with my size. But it was a good thing to hide behind. When I realised I didn't want to hide anymore I felt free enough to do it. I don't mind being looked at now, I used to hate it. I feel happy with myself for the first time ever.

And yes Twilight has played a large part in my transformation. It gave me a great escape when I really needed it. Not to mention finding Mr Pattinson. I have never gone potty over anyone before. Not like this anyway (ok Morten Harket when I was a kid, and you all know THAT story!!). I know some of you don't get it (yes DJ he did smell, he smelt wonderful, all hail the scruff!), but I'm very happy in my Rob bubble thank you.

My hubby Rich has been a little taken aback at these sudden changes in his wife, bless him. But not in a bad way. He's been telling me for years that I need to have more of a life of my own. Ok I may have taken it to extremes, but I always do!

Monday, 23 November 2009

I MET ROBERT PATTINSON!!!!




Ok it wasn't for very long but it still counts!! (I know I said I wouldn't get Robsessed on here but I lied!!)






Look how close I got! And he'd gone passed me by then.


So for those of you who are not on Face Book or Twitter with me (and why not?) I'll back up and explain. About three weeks ago it became known that there was going to be some kind of 'event' in Battersea Park to do with the release of New Moon (the second Twilight saga film in case you've been on another planet for the last few months). But no details were being given.


As you all know by now I am a huge Twilight fan, and especially in love with the totally edible Mr Pattinson (sigh). I knew it was a mad thing to do but I decided that if they really were doing something in London then I was going.


I waited, and waited. Checked the web a zillion times a day (got up at two in the morning once). Still nothing.


We had a holiday booked in Brixham so I got myself a Dongle to be sure I could still get online. I gave my mobile number to my 'spies' with instructions to call me if they heard anything. And started waiting again.


Finally on the Tuesday it was announced! Yes it was happening, but you could only win tickets not buy them. So I entered my name in the ballot and crossed everything I could, and some things I couldn't! And waited again, I was doing a lot of that.


I wasn't going to know if I had tickets until two days before and Cornwall is a long way from London. Should I just go anyway? Should I wait and hope I could get a room when I got there? Should I book something just in case? I was a mess of indecision. And then I got a text.


We were in the coffee shop in Debenhams in Troquay when Rob started talking to me (my phone is set so that Rob talks to me rather than a ring tone, yes I know, I know). It was the lovely Kate from Robsessed Blog. They were doing the red carpet thing, so even if I didn't get a ticket to the actual do I could still get to see them all! Ok decision made.


And so early on the Tuesday morning of the 10th November Rich (my very patient husband) put me on the first of three coaches and waved me off. I spent the next 12 hours (yes 12) on a coach or sitting waiting for a coach, all on my own. I was beginning to question my sanity. Still I had my iPod and someone else was driving.


Finally at 8.30pm I reached my BFF's house and found the key she had left for me. I booked a taxi to take me to Northampton station first thing in the morning. You see I hadn't actually got as far as London yet. Heather's sofa was just as comfy this time as the last time, and two kittens bouncing on me all night was fun (well I kept telling myself that). Needless to say I didn't sleep much.


The next morning I got the train to London and finally met up with two fellow Twilighters. But they had been lucky enough to win tickets. No I hadn't even got a ticket, I was just going on the off chance of getting close enough to the front of the barrier. Still it meant I didn't have to travel across London on my own, that was the bit I wasn't looking forward to.


We got to Battersea Park about 11am and I took my place in the red carpet line. I was near the front so I was hopeful. I settled down and started waiting again.


Five hours later they started letting us through. I took a deep breath and went for it. I got to the front of the barrier! Yes, I was defiantly going to see him!!!!


Another couple of hours passed, but they were a great bunch. What I hadn't bargained for was the banks of press that were opposite!! Oh hell all those cameras!!! I was cold, I'd been rained on (twice) and was not looking my best. Still they kept filming us. Now I had promised to be dignified I was NOT going to turn into fangirlie. Well that all went to hell because they kept telling us to scream. Oh please don't make me do it again! Then someone interviewed me (no idea who). Well it passed the time anyway.


And then a big car with blacked out windows pulled up. There was a collective holding of breath. OH MY GOD THERE HE IS!! I just stared, and stared. He got closer, and closer. If a man can be beautiful the he is.




He signed my copy of December's Vanity Fair (get it and you'll see why). I don't remember speaking to him, but when I went on youtube a few days later there I am saying something!!


Rob was followed by the others, who were all lovely (although Taylor is a lot shorter than I was expecting!). I got the full set of autographs and we got to watch them give their interviews and have their photos taken. They were out there for almost an hour, it was amazing. Those inside didn't get close enough for autographs and only got about 15 mins with them, so I think I got the better deal after all.


The third film comes out in June and guess where I'll be?

Saturday, 24 October 2009

Scattered Leaves

Oh dear has it really been that long since I last blogged???
The trouble is that most of you lovelies are either on Face Book or Twitter so I can keep up with you all everyday. However I used to love my little blog world so I'm going to try and make myself spend some time here at least once a week. I'm not half as busy as some of you and you all manage it!!

So a brief update. Jamie is loving school, doing really well. His shunt seems to have made a big difference, he's so more responsive. Let's hope it continues.

Dad is getting better and better. In fact you really wouldn't know there had been much wrong with him!! I am starting to look forward to Christmas now I know he'll be there for it.

I have a new tattoo!! Well loads actually if you count them individually, which I haven't done yet. But I have a large constellation of solid black and open stars in a wave across my lower back (yes I know a tattoo there is called a slag tag). I would love to get it extended all up my left side and have it circle around my 'Be safe', but Rich not keen, I'll talk him round. I will almost certainly have some of the open ones coloured in in purple though.

Anyone who Face books with me will know my little obsession with Twilight and Rob Pattinson. Well the new film is out soon and I finally got tickets booked!! A group of us are all going together so heaven help Scotts in Barnstaple on the 21st November!!! I haven't looked forward to anything quite so much for a long time. And I have entered a comp to win tickets to the LA premier on 16th, keep it all crossed for me!!!!

And now for the reason for this post. As you know a few weeks ago the fab D J Kirkby was giving away copies of 'Scattered Leaves' by Richard E. Roach. And I won a copy! I promised to Post a review here when I finished it.

It's not the sort of book I would have chosen I have to admit, not my subject matter at all. But I try to be open minded in all things.
I was a little uncomfortable with the graphic violence, particularly the many rapes. But I can see that they were vital to the story. It makes you realise that bad things really can happen to anyone for no good reason.
Roach created characters that you cared about. You wanted them to get away with things and to end up the way they did. It really was a page turner.
If I had one criticism it was with some of the dialogue, a little clunky at times. But this didn't detract too much. I would defiantly recommend it to anyone who likes something a little different to the conventional romance, because that is basically what it is. But be prepared to feel sick as well as happy and angry.

I will also post a review on amazon D J. And thank you. I also won a copy of 'Motorbikes, ducks and crispy sweet apples' by Christopher I King. I will be reading and reviewing soon. But I promised Lucy that I would read 'Hens reunited' next. Watch this space (but not too closely as it might be a bit like watching paint dry!)

Sunday, 27 September 2009

Bad Blogger, again *hangs head*.

I know, I know. I'm getting really lax at this since becoming a face book addict! The trouble is that most of you are on there so I can catch up with you all everyday. And now I have discovered Twitter as well (thanks Caroline) and so many of you are also there....oh dear. Anyway I promise to try and keep more up to date. And I also promise that, from now on this blog will be a Twilight/Rob free zone (unless something really exciting happens).

So to catch up. Well very exciting was winning a book from the always fab DJ Kirkby. 'Motorbikes, ducks and crispy sweet apples' by Christopher I King (her lovely hubby). I'm looking forward to reading it. As well as Lucy diamonds new book 'Hens Reunited'. Trouble is I'm not reading much at the mo. I seem to have a lot or random writing ideas popping into my head and evenings are spent getting them down on paper. But I will read them and post reviews here and on amazon I promise.

My other excuse is a snotty cold. And that Jamie has gone back to his nighttime antics (Annicles please help with the vibes!!).

Other news. I have lost a whole stone!! And have, just about, dropped a dress size. I am very chuffed. The trouble is I now have to keep pulling my jeans and skirts up!! But I'm not complaining.

Dad is much better. He's putting weight back on and, I hope, has turned a corner.

I still haven't got anymore writing news for you. The world of publishing moves sooooooo slowly. But I will post as soon as there's something to tell.

I love you all heaps. And I will try and be a better blog friend from now on xxx

Sunday, 13 September 2009

Sad but desperate!

I know I'm sad but I'm also desperate!!!!

Is there anyone out there in blogland who know someone who can put me in touch with someone who can get tickets to the New Moon premier? I will pay money, or do almost anything else!! Pleeeeeeeeease???

Ok sad Twilighter blog post over.

Wednesday, 9 September 2009

Call yourself a writer....

The lovely DJ Kirkby tagged me to do this meme.

Which words do you use too much in your righting? - Really, I know I do but still do it.

Which words do you consider overused in stuff you read?- Too many exclamation marks are a pain, but no words in particular, not in general anyway.

What is your favorite piece of writing by you?- A couple of short stories I wrote. 'Living the Dream' and 'Dolphin Creature'.

Which blog do you wish you'd written? -All the ones I follow!

Regrets. Do you have a few? Is there anything you wish you hadn't written? -In a word, no.

How has your writing made a difference?/What do you consider your most important piece of writing? - I would never be that presumptuous!

Name three favorite words? -(I know I can't say Twilight three times!). Richard and Jamie.

And three words you're not keen on?- All words are right if they are used well.

Do you have a writing mentor, role model or inspiration? - No mentor. And too many inspirations to mention here. I love Katie Fforde, Virginia Wolfe, Alice Walker......

What's your writing ambition? To get published. And if I can make some money at it so much the better.

So now I have to tag people. The trouble is those I would have tagged have already been tagged! So if you like this and want to do it then consider yourself tagged! (I'm doing the explanation mars thing aren't I?)

Sunday, 30 August 2009

Catching up...again!

It's been a while again hasn't it? Sorry.

Ok so what has been going on in Claire land? Well those of you who Face book with me (click the link, you know you want to) will know that Richard and I celebrated our ninth wedding anniversary last week. We have actually been together eighteen years (yes I was 16), but only married for the last nine. I had a lovely bouquet of flowers delivered, bless him, he never forgets.

Some of you also know of my tattoo plans (thanks for the sound effects Blu!!). A few of you know what I'm having and where, but I'm not telling here. I will post a photo when the deed has been done on the 8th Sept. Listen for the screaming about ten in the morning!!

Jamie is fully recovered now. His tummy scar is still a little sore, but this is as much to do with the plaster as the wound itself. It seems he has inherited a tendency to be allergic to some dressings. We shall have to watch that in future. I wish I had half his energy. He was up at 2am this morning, went back to sleep for a hour around 7.30, and he's bouncing round like he's had 12 hours!!! Now I remember when 2am was the time to crawl into bed after doing something your mother wouldn't approve of (although my parents were so liberal and laid back they were almost horizontal!). Now I'm groping around for my glasses so that I can change a nappy and a wet bottom sheet, oh how did my life get this glam!!

Still at least the silly season is almost over. Yesterday was the last busy changeover day, we hope. It's just so intense for about eight weeks, manic. Then we get the rest of the year off, in theory. But the best laid plans and all that. Are we taking bets on a rush of late lets for the autumn? Not that I should knock it, it's our living after all. Or it is for now. The novelty has well and truly worn off and next year might be our last year. No idea what we'll, or rather what Rich, will do instead but hey something will turn up, usually dose.

So that's us for now. x

Monday, 17 August 2009

Bad blogger!!!

Oh dear it has been too long since I blogged!! The culprit is Face Book. Because so many of you are there I can catch up with you all and forget about my poor blog!

So what has been happening in Claire land recently. Honestly? Well not much actually. And to be honest that's been nice after the last few weeks of madness. Dad is getting better by the day. Jamie has bounced right back (and not sleeping much, so we know he's fine!!).

You will all (especially a couple of you, you know who you are) be please to know that I have decided to leave the Twilighting to FB and not bore you all with it on here. I heard that round of applause Annicles!!

I had an email from my agent the other day to say that she was very positive about selling DV, so fingers crossed. She seems to think we may start to hear something next month when the hols are over. I am living proof that it can be done, so all of you fellow writers out there don't despair and keep going.

And to go off on another random angle. I have decided to start trying to potty train Jamie again. We gave it a go last summer, but with no luck. If anyone out there has any hints for potty training a profoundly autistic child who is also non verbal, then please share.

Sunday, 9 August 2009

Catching up...






We're back. Properly this time, not dashing off again. It has been a some what intense week or so.




First of all the wedding. It was wonderful. I think the pics say it all really. Everyone had a great time. It was a shame we couldn't stay till the bitter end. But it was a child free wedding so Jamie spent the day with my aunt. We didn't want to leave him there too long so we left about eight. But it was worth the 250 miles and the jam on the M5! One of the best things was realising that I'm not the only 30something Twilighter! (this is my blog and I'll Twilight if I want to!). Arrangements are being made for a girlie weekend when 'New Moon' come out in November.



And then we were off to Bristol. They do everything they can to make it all as easy as possible, but it's still hard. Apart from anything else there is so much waiting around.
The op itself didn't go as well as expected. They had a problem getting the shunt tube where they wanted which meant a quick trip to the scanner and then back to theatre to redo it. We didn't know any of this until it was all over fortunately.
Throughout it all Jamie was a star. And now he seems back to his old self (he was up at 2.30 this morning so he must be feeling better). Fingers crossed that this is it. There will be follow ups of course, and other appointments for his other conditions, but hopefully the hydrocephalus is sorted.







Tuesday, 4 August 2009

Short and sweet part two.

This is me and Heather (Hevs).


We're back. Till the morning anyway

The wedding was fab, really great. If you go to my facebook page you can see all the pics. but here are a couple.
Off the Bristol in the morning so they can drill holes in Jamie's head, gulp.



Thursday, 30 July 2009

Short and sweet.




This is just a short post to say goodbye for a few days. We're off in the morning till Monday. I might be back online Tuesday, but then we're off again Weds to Bristol for Jamie's op.

BTW I went for the black nail polish in the end. And they are my own nails!
See you all next week xxxxx




Monday, 27 July 2009

Summer....or not!

Well Saturday was summer, that was it, one day. Yesterday it suddenly became October! Today, well it's still not sure :/

As some of you know from face book I had a rather stressful day last week. Dad suddenly took a turn for the worse. We got the doc out, there were blood tests and chest x-rays. His breathing had become very shallow and we all thought he would be going right back into hospital. Turns out he was just very anemic and is now on liquid iron supplement and thriving again. So one disaster averted.
However we had just said goodbye to the doc for dad when Richard called.
'Don't panic.' He says. Ok choose the two word that are instantly going to make me have kittens!
'Why?'
'Can you come and pick me up from the hospital?'
'What!!!' Ok Claire breathe. 'Why?'
'I had a funny turn and they took me in.'
It turns out that he was feeling a bit pants so he went to make a doctors appointment. When the receptionist called up his history on screen and saw he'd had a heart attack she sent him to the cottage hospital across the road. The then did an angiogram (spelling?). But they weren't happy so they called an ambulance.
He was fine. All he'd done was pulled a muscle in his shoulder which was causing the pain!!!
But I didn't know that until I got there. So I drove like a Cullen all the way, speed limits, what speed limits? Jamie in the back thinking mummy has finally lost it. When we got there he was standing outside waiting for us, like nothing was wrong. And a slightly sheepish look it has to be said.
He drove home!

So everyone is fine. Deep breaths all round.

On a completely different note my pink feather boa has just arrived. Some of you know about this.
It's the wedding this weekend so we're off on Friday. All those that were at the hen weekend have got to bring a pink feather boa for the reception. There is talk of dancing with them!!!! Ok I don't dance, can't dance, gulp. I think a lot of alcohol will be needed!

I have my dress. It's black and lacy. Yes I know it's a wedding, but this is H's wedding. All will clear when you see the pics next week. Let's just say it will all be very Gothic, so black is fine, especially with blood red, 5 inch heels!

Saturday, 18 July 2009

Reasons to be cheerful....

Dad came home on Thursday. I can't say he's fine, but he is much better. He's confined to upstairs and can't get out of bed much, but he's well in himself. He has a couple of cracking scars and still has a feeding tube, which he hates. But at least he's home. And his doc is very pleased with how everything went. So it's just a matter of time now while he heals.

And Jamie gave me a lay in this morning! Those of you on face book will know that the other day he decided to get up at 1.30am!!!!!!!!! Well he made up for it today. I woke at about nine with a sudden panic that he wasn't knocking to get up (he knocks on the inside of his door when he want to get up). I went to check him but he was still fast asleep. So I went back to bed, hurahh. Luckily for me Richard had given me the day off today. Usually I would be working on a Saturday. So it worked out perfectly. I got a proper lay in, the first for.....ummm....can't remember.

My agent now has 'Digging for Victoria' on ten CD's to send out, fingers crossed.

Now it the climate would just hurry up and remember that it's summer!?!? Ok rain is good. The gardens need it etc. But really, enough already!

Friday, 10 July 2009

Ok now I can tell you.

I'm so excited!! You may remember a few posts back I was talking about subbing 'Digging for Victoria' to agents? Well one said YES!!!!

I got the email last week and wanted so much to tell everyone. But I was scared to until I had signed on the dotted line. Well I did that today, just now in fact. So I now have a proper contract with a proper literary agent who wants to sell my novel. Someone pinch me or something! :)

She has said lots of very nice things and seems confident that she can get me published. I'll wake up soon I know I will. How long have I dreamed about this? Can't remember, too long.

So you see it can be done. Hell if I can manage it then anyone can.

Bloody hell I'm a proper writer, with a agent!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, 7 July 2009

It was worth it!!




Wow that was bloody brilliant! I want to go again, now! The pic to the left is of the girls outside the theatre. The pic to the right is of H the 'blushing' bride to be. We were working it out that we have been friends nearly 20 years, where did that go?
The journey up was long, but good. I took my CD walkman and Twilight audio book (I know, I know) and quite enjoyed myself. A night on H's sofa, with L on the other sofa and two kittens bouncing around was also fun. Then London. We went to Camden, a part of London I hadn't been to before. I loved it. I could have spent a fortune if I hadn't got to cart it around all weekend!! And two of the girls turned out to be fellow Twilighters, result!!
As for the show. Go, you must. It was amazing. You must go and see for yourself. Everything about it was just awesome. I want to go again, anyone interested? After the show it was back to the hotel to generally mess about until 3am. There was wine and chocolate and face packs (you are NOT seeing that photo, although someone, you know who you are, posted it on her facebook page!!!).
SO now it's back to reality. Dad had his op yesterday and it went really well. They are very pleased with him. Such a relief.
As for the other news. Still nothing signed yet. But I will tell all when I can. So things have turned on their head some what. Life can change completely just like that.

Thursday, 2 July 2009

A new blog and a bit of news..

Right I'm off, well I will be in the morning. Finally got the bus ticket fiacso sorted. I did as rainbowmummy said and called them. I cancelled the email ticket and went into the tourist info place in town and bought a ticket, just like that. So now I have it in my Prada messenger bag (name dropper!!) all ready. And yes Pauline it is the show with Jason Donovan.

I am taking the camera but I'm not promising the quality of the photos. It will rather depend on how much alcohol is involved. And as I'm not driving.... Anyway You will get all the gory details next week. But I may put them on a new blog I have been invited to be part of. Dirty British Girls. I think the name speaks for itself!!! Please come and say hi.

So other news. Well poor Jamie has got something called ursicaria (I'm not sure it that's how you spell it.) He came up in a really itcy red rash all over his body on Tuesday evening. A trip to the docs revealed it's this ursicaria. It is an allergic reaction to something he's ingested, but no idea what. We keep a food diary for him because of his digestive problems, but nothing seems to be new to his diet. My first thought was oh well that's the trip off then. But he's fine. Still really happy and bouncy, just itchy. And Richard has more or less insisted I go and 'have a life' as he put it. But I shall leave my phone on all weekend.

And now for some news on the writing front. You may remember that a while ago I started subbing 'Digging for Victoria' to agents? Well a few weeks ago one came back and asked to read the whole thing. Well that happened with 'Mulberry Gin' but it came to nothing. However this time...well let's just say it's better news. Nothing has been signed yet so I'm not going to go into details.

So I will see you next week! By then there should be some news on dad. The op is Monday morning. Everything crossed. I hope my good news isn't going to be eclipsed by something really, really bad.

Tuesday, 30 June 2009

It had better be woth it!!!!!

How hard can it be to book a coach ticket online and then print it off? VERY HARD INDEED!!!!
I booked my coach up to Northampton, where I will be sleeping on friends floor (very dignified), for Friday. I chickened out of driving, apart from anything else it's too hot. Anyway the booking all went smoothly. As did booking the train home from London for Sunday. The train ticket arrived yesterday in the post, lovely. The coach ticket, AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

They send you an email to confirm your booking, and a link to view and print your e-ticket. Easy I thought. Except it won't let me! I've been going round in circles for three days now. Endless phone calls to National Express. They assure me that as long as I have the booking ref, and all the numbers they've given me then I can still travel. I just have visions of being on a platform with the bus about to leave and the driver refusing to let me on because I haven't got the actual ticket. I could be stranded hundreds of miles from home. Ok I know that's what credit cards are for. But I really don't need the extra stress. This weekend had better be worth it!!

Dad's surgery has been brought forward. He goes in Sunday. So I'm getting the train to Exeter so that I can see him Sunday night. Then they're going to operate Monday. I'm trying not to think about that. I'm hoping this weekend will take my mind off it all. But I'm going to miss Jamie sooooo much. I have never been away from him since he was in special care as a baby. What it Richard doesn't hear him in the night? What if he gets too stressed at me being gone? What if he doesn't miss me at all?

Wednesday, 24 June 2009

Here we go again!!!!

I have been off radar for a few days, not intentionally. I won't bore you with the gory details, but lets just say a rabbit in the headlights has had nothing on me these last few days. Everything seems to have been going on around me. It has been taking a lot to remember to breathe in and out and put one foot in front of the other. But I did remember, and now I'm back. I will be catching up with all your lovely blogs and comments as soon as I can.

Wimbledon as started, hurah! I never watch sport, but love Wimbledon, go figure! Maybe it's because it means summer's here? Mind you summer means holiday makers, in droves, with all their peculiarities. Of which they have many. I expect they will appear here over the next few weeks.

Dad had the letter we had been waiting for, and dreading. He's been booked in for surgery on 7th July. He sees his doc tomorrow to find out the details. They have told us that there is a 10% chance he won't survive the surgery, this is not good odds apparently. I'm trying very hard to not think that these might be the last few days I have with him.

On a brighter note I'm off to London on 3rd for a hen weekend (I know, at my age!!). The friend was never, under any circumstances going to get married. So I'm going to prove to myself that it's real. And two days in London will be fab. We're going to a show, do some shopping...maybe drink too much (did I just say that out loud?) Anyway will take the camera and put the, probably very embarrassing, pics up.

The show is 'Priscilla, Queen of the Dessert'. I'm sure there's a link somewhere. If you've never seen the film you must, it's the funniest thing ever. You will never look at a ping pong ball in the same way again!!

Wednesday, 17 June 2009

A rather boring post. Sorry.

Well it was summer here for three days. Yes a whole three days! But normal service had been resumed and today has been wet. And not just rain, thick fog! In June.

I have to say that not a lot has changed. Dad had another overnight stay in Exeter hospital. They finally did the tests they were supposed to do two weeks ago. So now we wait. He's eating better now though.

We had Jamie's TAC meeting at school today. It went very well. They are very happy with him. In fact they love him to bits! And he's not the baby anymore, they have a little girl started who is younger than him. He wasn't there this afternoon because Wednesday is horse riding. He loves it apparently. They have taken some photos so I hope they'll let us have copies. It seems that he won't hold on though. He sits in the saddle and flaps with joy as someone holds him on! I can just see it. Bless him.

Ok I have the telly on and they are talking about stuffing slugs, cooking them and eating them!! I think I might have just lost the will to live.

Oh yes and I'm now on facebook. I know I have always said I wouldn't go there like I need something else to stop me doing everything else I should be doing!! As soon as I can work out how to link to my page I'll put it up.

Thursday, 11 June 2009

The sun is shining (for now).

First of all thank you to everyone who said nice things about my story. I know it was a bit long for a blog, so thanks for taking the time to read it.



And welcome to my new followers. denise-macandrews I can't seem to find your blog.

Things have been quiet round here for a change. Jamie had another eye test last week. He was his normal not very co-operative self. But it went ok and they were happy with him.

Dad came home from Exeter hospital. He's put weight back on and his lung seems to be healing. Did I mention that? They wanted to do a biopsy on another spot the found. In the process the damaged him lung! Still he seems a little better for the moment. He has to go back next week overnight for more tests.

And the sun is out! I've dusted off the sunglasses and changed my wardrobe over. That makes me sound very posh. But really I have a very small wardrobe, that I have to share with Richard, so when the summer clothes come out the winter ones have to be packed away, and vice versa.

So I might be able to finish attacking the garden. I promised more garden pics didn't I? Ok I'll see what state it's in over the weekend.

Thursday, 4 June 2009

I want to tell you a story.....

I wrote this last year. It's, more or less, a dream I had, one of those really vivid ones. Hope you like it.


The Little Dolphin Creature


She walks in carrying the margarine tub cupped in both her frail, lined hands. With a soft smile she places it gently on the counter and lets out a satisfied sigh. She doesn’t
seem to see the girl behind the counter who is smiling
brightly back at her, waiting. She stares passed the girl to the back office, where Mel is busy staring out of the window when she should be filing. With a nod to herself the old lady eventually turns her face to the still smiling girl.
‘Hello my dear.’
‘Can I help you madam?’
‘I shouldn’t think so, but I think that young lady might.’ The old lady points a long, slender finger over the girls shoulder to Mel. The girl turns and looks. With a frown she turns back.
‘Mel isn’t a vet either. I assume you have brought something in to see a vet?’ She nods to the margarine tub.
‘Oh yes. I have a sick creature if that’s what you mean.’
‘So you want a vet, not a nurse.’ The girl says firmly, shooting another glare over to where Mel is oblivious and still staring out of the window.
‘If you insist dear. But I would like that young lady to join us, if you please.’ The old lady keeps the soft smile and lays her hand gently on the margarine tub.
The girl frowns again and pushes a button on the internal phone.
‘I have a lady out here with something that needs the vet…No I don’t know what it is but it’s in a margarine tub so it’s not big…. Yes I will, but she wants Mel…. I don’t know…. well that’s what she said…Ok.’ With a heavy sigh the girl puts the phone down and turns to the back room.
‘Mel!’ she calls. ‘Can you get yourself to room three to assist David?’ She turns back to the old lady with slightly strained smile. ‘Could you go through to room three please, David will see you.’
‘Thank you dear.’ The old lady carefully picks up the margarine tub and walks silently through the double doors to the consulting rooms.

Mel drags her eyes away from the dancing trees when she hears her name. Slowly she turns to the source of the sound. It is Connie telling her to go and help one of the vets. This is odd, it isn’t her day to be out front. She loves it, of course she does, but some days all she wants to do is hide out here and pretend to be doing paperwork. Today is one of those days. She’d sighed with relief that morning when she saw that she wasn’t on the nursing rota. She pads through to the front desk to see what was going on.
‘You’ve been asked for by her.’ Connie nods to the back of the old lady who is disappearing through the doors.
‘Why?’ asks Mel.
‘Don’t ask me. I assumed she must know you.’ Connie shrugs.
‘No, I don’t think so.’
‘Well she wants you rather than me so you better get through there.’ Connie tosses her head and turns back to the desk.
Mel follows the old lady through to the consultation rooms. David is waiting and greets the old lady with a dazzling smile.
‘Hello there and what can we do for you today?’ he gushes. The old lady looks right passed him towards Mel. She hands the margarine tub to Mel with great care.
‘I’ve brought you this.’ She says looking Mel deep in the eye. Mel tries to look away, but can’t.
Mel takes the margarine tub gently and sets it down on the examination table. She looks up at David, who nods. Carefully Mel lifts the lid. They peer in to see that the tub is filled with water. To begin with they think it is empty. Then Mel sees a flicker of movement from one corner. She points and they get their faces right down until their noses are almost in the water. The little flicker slowly moves out into the middle of the tub and shows itself. It looks like a dolphin; but it is barely the size of a little finger. Mel gasps and looks across at David. David stands up and purses his lips.
‘Where did you get this?’ he asks.
‘Oh I’ve had him a long time.’ The old lady still keeps her eyes fixed on Mel.
‘And why have you brought him to see us today?’ David continues.
‘He’s sick.’ The old lady says to Mel.
‘In what way?’ David asks.
‘He needs looking after and I can’t do it anymore. He’s ready to move on.’ The old lady continues to fix her attention on Mel while she speaks. Mel shifts her weight and tries again to look away.
The creature gives a small flick of the tail that makes the water ripple. They all turn back to look into the margarine tub.
‘You said he’s sick madam. What are his symptoms?’ David tries to keep the tension out of his voice. He has no idea what the creature is or what on earth he is supposed to do with it. With any luck he can convince the old dear that there really isn’t anything wrong with it and she’ll take it away again.
‘He needs taking care of.’ She says simply.
‘We are a vets madam. We can only take care of your…pet if you tell us what’s wrong with it.’
‘I think if this young lady takes him home for a while he’ll be much better in no time.’ The old lady smiles her soft smile and gives Mel a look that makes her glow and shiver at the same time. She tries to smile back but all she can think of is the little thing struggling in the margarine tub. It needs help and all David seems to be doing is going round and round in circles.
‘I could take it.’ Mel says. ‘I could take it home and keep it in my old fish tank for a few days, see how it gets on.’
‘That would be perfect dear, thank you.’ The old lady finally takes her eyes off Mel and turns to David.
‘I don’t think we can do that madam. It’s not very professional. The nurses can’t just take animals home you know. Especially if we don’t know anything about it.’ He shoots Mel a look that tells her she will be in trouble later. Strangely she doesn’t care this time. She keeps looking at the margarine tub. The tiny dolphin creature is still again now, for a moment she thinks it is dead. Then it twists its body and she breaths again.
‘Oh that’s all right dear.’ The old lady turns her soft smile on David. ‘I really think it will be for the best. I’ll leave him here with, Mel was it? Yes with Mel. Thank you very much.’ And she turns before anyone can say anything, and is gone.
David opens his mouth to call after the old lady but can’t. Instead he turns to Mel and pushes the margarine tub across the table to her.
‘Take whatever it is and flush it. I don’t even know what it is let alone what’s wrong with it. And don’t you ever do that again.’ He storms out of the room, his embarrassment turned to anger.
Mel stares at the margarine tub. Quietly she peeps in and sees the little dolphin creature. It turns its head until one eye is looking up through the water and meets hers. She blinks in surprise and jumps back. When she looks again it is still looking at her. There is no way she is going to flush it down the toilet. Carefully she puts the lid back on and takes it to the staff room. She tucks it away at the back of her locker. Then goes and flushes the toilet so David will think she had done as he has asked.

When she gets home she fetches her old fish tank out from under the stairs and fills it with bottled water. With panic she realises she doesn’t know whether should be fresh or salt water. She dips her finger in the margarine tub and licks it. It isn’t salty, good. Carefully she takes the tub and tips it up over the tank. The little dolphin creature plops into the clear water and sinks down to the bottom. Mel holds her breath and watches. For a long time nothing happens. Mel pulls up a chair and sits by the tank. For three hours she sits and stares at the little dolphin creature. Still it doesn’t move. By midnight she can hold back no longer and lets the tears fall. It was dead, it had to be.
She sits and mourns. She mourns for the little dolphin creature. She mourns for her mother. She mourns for her sister and the foetus that went with her. And she mourns for something else; something she somehow knows she will now never have. When she’s empty and her shell collapses down on the kitchen chair she sees a flicker. Her red eyes move across to focus on the tank. There, swimming about, is the little dolphin creature. Mel starts to cry again.
The next morning Mel hurries down stairs into the kitchen. As she opens the door she stops dead. In the fish tank the little dolphin creature isn’t as little as it was. Overnight it had grown, doubled in size. It flicks its tail and turns to look at her. Through the glass it holds her gaze. Mel gets down to its level and they watch each other. Suddenly a thought occurs to Mel.
‘You must be hungry. What do you eat?’ She gives the little dolphin creature a questioning look. It twists its body round so that it is facing her again, but doesn’t answer.
Mel pulls open cupboards and hunts for something that might look right. She rejects cereal and bread, tinned beans and pasta. At the back of the top shelf she finds a tin of can food that she had bought the other week for the stray that is hanging around. She fishes it out and shows it to the little dolphin creature.
‘What do you think?’
The little dolphin creature turns a little summersault. Mel opens it and mashes a spoonful down with a fork. Carefully she drops little bits into the tank and waits. The little dolphin creature snaps the bits of food up while Mel watches from her post on the chair. She wants to sit there all day and just watch it. But the clock tells her she’s late so she drags herself back upstairs to dress.

Work is so slow Mel is convinced the clock has stopped. At lunch Connie tells her, in great detail, about her love life. Mel smiles and nods in all the right places, and stops listening after five minuets. In the middle of afternoon surgery David’s wife comes in with their baby daughter and she watches them be married. With a sigh she takes the dogs for their afternoon walk. On the way back she wonders about the little dolphin creature and the old lady. She realises that she has no idea who she was or how to get in touch with her. This is dreadful. She needs to talk to the old lady. She needs to ask her why the little dolphin creature grew so much like that. She needs to ask how she should take care of it. And what happens when it gets better?
Suddenly she feels warmth in the centre of her back. It feels like someone has put a warm hand on her back and is gently rubbing it, it feels nice. But it’s not the sort of feeling you should have in the middle of the street. Mel pulls herself up straight and slowly turns round. Standing just behind her is the old lady. Mel jumps and nearly lets go of the leads. The old lady smiles her soft smile.
‘Has he grown much?’ the old lady asks.
‘Oh…um…yes. Yes he has.’
‘I thought he would.’ The old lady nods to her self and in the time it takes Mel to adjust her grip on the dogs’ leads, she has gone. Mel spins round full circle, but nothing.

Mel doesn’t even take her coat off but goes straight through to the kitchen. In the tank the little dolphin creature now fills half the tank. Mel gasps and plops down on the chair to look closer. The little dolphin creature summersaults and splashes and Mel is sure he’s pleased to see her. She hurries to the fridge and gets out the rest of the morning’s cat food. The little dolphin creature twists and flips and then eats and eats.
All evening Mel sits on the kitchen chair and watches. The little dolphin creature performs all his best tricks for her until he is tired out. For the last hour before she goes to bed they sit and gaze at each other. Sometimes he looks so deep inside her Mel is sure he can actually see her heart beating. With great care, and not a little difficulty, Mel carries the tank upstairs and places in beside her bed. All night they watched each other.
In the morning she brings the tank back down into the kitchen. It is her day off and she decides they will spend it together. She has been a vetanary nurse for three years now and she had quickly learnt not to get emotionally involved with either the animals or their owners, it was just too painful. And this…thing…whatever he is, he isn’t the cutest thing she has ever seen, not at all. A fluffy kitten, a waggy puppy, she could understand. But this was a fist size fish with a long nose and boggy eyes. And yet as soon as she peered in the margarine tub she knew that she had to help him. Looking at him now her heart skips. He is gazing back at her with a look she wishes she could see in other eyes.
After breakfast they go through to the sitting room and she puts the TV on for the little dolphin creature. For a few minuets he floats, eyes fixed on the screen. Then he flicks his tail and turns away.
‘I agree.’ Mel says and turns it off.
The house has to be cleaned, dust removed and order returned. Mel puts the radio on and makes a start. The little dolphin creature watches her progress around the room, and waits for her when she goes to do the rest of the house.
She hasn’t noticed she was doing it until she catches her reflection in the mirror. All day she has been talking to the little dolphin creature. Mel blushes and turns away. In the tank the little dolphin creature waits for her to finish what she is telling him. He floats there with his head on one side. Mel smiles and puts a finger gently on the glass. The little dolphin creature bumps his nose against the glass where her finger is and Mel is sure she can feel the warmth ripple through. She leaves her hand there for a while, slowly unfolds her fingers until her whole palm is flat against the glass. The little dolphin creature rubs his head against the tank and Mel quietly sobs.

The next morning Mel throws open the curtains and cries out. In the tank the little dolphin creature is no longer little. He has grown so large over night that his nose and tail are rubbing against the sides of the tank. Mel runs to the bathroom and fills the bath.
The tank is very heavy and Mel struggles to get it through to the bathroom. In the end she slides it along the carpet, water sloshing over the sides and soaking the floor. The little dolphin creature watches Mel carefully, but he stays still, not scared. Mel heaves the tank up over the side of the bath and the little dolphin creature crashes into the full bath. Mel collapses on the bath mat exhausted. She hurries down stairs and fetches the little dolphin creature some food. She is late for work, she has to go. She blows him a kiss from the bathroom door and hurries away.
All day Mel worries. If the little dolphin creature keeps growing like this he will soon be too big for the bath, and then what? In three days he has grown to nearly ten times the size he was when the old lady brought him in in the margarine tub.
On her way home she remembers something. At the bottom of her parents garden there used to be a swimming pool. It has long ago been drained and is now overgrown. But it can be refilled can’t it? She can think of nothing else, no other solution, the alternative does not bare thinking about.
She opens the front door with a trembling hand and runs up the stairs. In the bath the now not so little dolphin creature is bobbing in the water. He twists around at the sound of her at the door, Mel is sure he smiles. She smiles back and drops to her knees beside the bath. An hour later she is still there, still in her coat with her bag at her side. The dolphin creature flicks and twists and puts on a show for her. Her hand hovers over the rim of the bath wanting to dip in. finally she touches the surface of the water with her fingertips. The dolphin creature turns around and touches her fingers with his nose. Mel is sure her heart has stopped. His nose is warm and soft and touching it feels so familiar. They stay there and watch each other. The dolphin creature looks into Mel’s eyes and she notices something. His eyes have changed colour. And the skin around his face has lightened. Mel starts to worry again. Is this normal or does it mean he’s sick again? But his eyes are bright, sparkling, and his skin is smooth and glowing.
When bedtime comes Mel cannot bare to leave the dolphin creature, so she drags her bedding into the bathroom and makes a bed for herself on the floor. All night she listens to his gentle splashings, and he listens to her gentle breathing.
By morning the dolphin creature has grown again. Mel takes a deep breath and calls her parents. While the phone rings Mel tries to decide how to explain the situation to her mother. She can see her mother rolling her eyes and deciding that her daughter has finally gone mad. If her mother had a better nature then she could try appealing to that. As it is she is going to have to rely on the truth and hope.
An answer phone kicks in and tells Mel that her parents have gone on a cruse around the world, Mel is glad she is not a burglar. This is good. She will drive down at the weekend and fill the pool. Mel prays the dolphin creature doesn’t grow too much in the mean time.
She goes back up to the bathroom and tells the dolphin creature that she is off to work. He flicks his tail and looks at her sadly. Then he makes the first sound she has heard. A low-pitched wail that sounds like ‘Nooooo’. As she turns to go down the stairs it comes again, then again. By the time her hand is on the door handle it is echoing around the whole house. The dolphin creature is begging her to stay. Mel has to go to work, she has to pay the rent, buy food. But her heart breaks a little more every time she hears that sound.
‘Nooooooooo!’
Mel drops her bag, shrugs off her coat and runs back up the stairs.
‘It’s ok. It’s ok.’ She sooths. The dolphin creature is flicking and twisting in great distress.
‘Hey, hey. I’m here. Look, look. I’m here.’ She stands and leans over the bath until she’s sure she will fall in. Slowly the thrashing around eases, he calms. He gazes up at her and says thank you as best he can.
‘I need to go down stairs and call them. Tell them I’m not coming. But I’ll be right back.’ She watches and is sure she sees him nod. She nods back and dashes down to call the vets.
Mel is not good at lying and she is sure they don’t believe a word. Still it can’t be helped, and now there are more important things.

Saturday comes not too soon. The dolphin creature is bursting out of the bath now and he has to be moved. Mel explains why she is having to leave him. He looks at her and blinks his long lashes. When she leaves she listens for the cry from the dolphin creature, but it doesn’t come. He understands.
Mel drives down to her parents’ house in the country and hopes they still leave the key under the same flowerpot.
They do. Mel wastes no time in setting up the hosepipe. Dragging it across the lawn and threw the thicket of brambles and bracken that had grown up around the swimming pool isn’t easy, but she has to do it. Eventually water is gushing into the empty, gaping blueish green hole in the ground. As Mel watches something occurs to her that makes her loose her balance for a moment. How is she going to get the dolphin creature from her flat to this swimming pool? And what if he’s grown again by the time she gets home? Mel goes pale. She has to think. Her car might be big enough if she lets the back seats down. But he will be heavy. And it is quite a long drive. How will she keep him wet? She can’t keep him wet. She feels faint and leans against a tree.

The dolphin creature watches Mel as she moves around the room gathering towels. She runs each one under the tap until the floor is covered in sodden piles. He tries to flick his tail but he is now so big he can no longer move. He is wary and he doesn’t take his eyes off her. But Mel can’t look at the dolphin creature. She knows there is a good chance this might not work, she might be about to let him down in the worse way. And she tries not to think about getting him to the car.
The time comes and she has to try. She lays a row of towels out on the bathroom floor and takes a deep breath. She scoops her hands under the dolphin creature’s belly and is amazed. She lifts him out of the water as easily as if he was still in the margarine tub. Because she has braced herself so much for the expected weight she nearly falls backwards.
Recovering herself Mel wraps the dolphin creature in as many of the wet towels as she can, and tries hard not to feel the warmth of his skin.
The drive takes longer than it has ever taken before. At every junction and at every red light Mel turns to check the dolphin creature. He gazes back at her and rolls his big eyes. Mel bites her lip and puts her foot down.

The dolphin creature is even lighter in her arms now and Mel runs across the lawn. She stumbles, trips and runs on until she is beside the swimming pool. The towels are almost dry by now and his skin is cooler. Mel drops to her knees and rolls the dolphin creature into the water. He disappears into the darkness and Mel wishes she had had time to clean the disused pool from its years of dead leaves and slime. Her eyes scan the murky water for a sign of him in there. The sun starts to rise and lights up the garden. Mel gets down on her knees and puts her face down to the water’s surface. She peers and peers until she sees a shadow. There, at the bottom lays the dolphin creature. Still. Mel sits back on her heels and waits. An hour passes, then two, then three. There is no movement, no stirring. The dolphin creature sits on the bottom of the pool unmoving.
The tears drop silently onto the stones and splash into the water. Mel sits and stares into the water until she stops seeing anything. She knew there was a chance, a good chance this would happen, but what choice did she have? After another hour of nothing Mel stands and hugs herself, pulling the garden around her like a blanket. He’s gone, it’s finished.
Mel peers again into the water, trying to catch a last glimpse, to say goodbye. But she can no longer see anything down there. She pulls off her coat, kicks off her shoes and jumps. She takes a deep breath and dives down into the darkness. She kicks down and kicks down until she is on the bottom. She opens her eyes but can see nothing. Then the sunlight filters through and she sees.
The dolphin creature is lying still where he has settled. Mel swims over and reaches out to him. Gently she lays her hand on the dolphin creature’s side. For as long as she can she strokes the cold body and mixes a little salt water into the fresh. She has to get back up or she will have to stay there with him forever. She lets the dolphin creature go and floats back up to the surface.
Mel heaves herself out of the water and pulls one of the now dry towels around her shoulders. For the rest of the day she sits crossed legged on the poolside. After a while she stops thinking and nearly stops breathing, everything beyond her.
She doesn’t notice for a long time. The ripples get bigger and bigger until it is impossible not to see them. Her neck is stiff, her back screaming, but she manages to turn her head enough to watch the water start to move. For a few minuets she watches without seeing. Slowly, slowly her brain catches up and she starts to realise that what she is seeing is very strange indeed. She carefully uncrosses her legs and crawls to the pool edge. Kneeling and watching Mel sees the ripples turn into small waves that start to lap at the pool edge. The waves start to splash up over the side, soaking Mel’s skirt. She knows she should be scared, this is not normal. But she isn’t. In fact she is very calm, fascinated. With wide eyes she stares at the heaving water. There is a centre point that is creating the disturbance. Mel watches the place where the dolphin creature lay as the water starts to bubble. She stands and takes a step back. From the bubbling foam a shape starts to rise from the water.
The shadows start to clear, the water calms and there he stands in front of her. His large eyes are human but Mel knows them well. Wide and clear, deep blue they are the eyes she has spent so long looking into. His tall, broad nakedness, the dark hair falling around his face, and the wide smile keep Mel rooted. For a long time they drink each other in.
Finally he holds out his hand to her. Mel takes a step forward and melts into him as he curls his strong arms around her. She tilts her head up and they look deep into each other. Gently he dips his head down and kisses her. Mel slips her arms around his neck and the rest of the world disappears.
At the edge of the lawn the old lady folds her arms contentedly and nods.

Wednesday, 27 May 2009

Playing again.

Thank you so much to all of you for being soooo kind and understanding, again. It's wonderful the way you all rally round. I'm still swimming through treacle, but at least I'm swimming now, not drowning. And I've decided I might start playing the game again, for a bit, see how it goes.

So here's a brief update. As I mentioned dad's back in hospital. They found a spot in one of the scans that they wanted to investigate. However while they were investigating they damaged his lung, as you do. So now he's puffed up like a bull frog and on a machine to pump the excess air out of where it shouldn't be. He looks very strange. At the moment they're saying he'll be in till Monday. So then we'll see. The annoying thing is they don't think this spot is actually anything anyway, so he's probably been through all this for nothing! Hurumph.

Now Anna willed Jamie to sleep, and it worked! For two night anyway. Ho hum. Still 4am this morning wasn't as bad as 1.25 the morning before.

But I have a wonderful escape hatch. He's called Edward and he's a vampire. Maybe it's the stress and lack of sleep, but I've developed a real thing for him. I know, I know you don't need to say it. I'll do you a deal. If you stop laughing, I'll stop baning on about it, ok?

Saturday, 23 May 2009

I don't want to play this game any more.

Had a crap couple of days and I just don't want to play any more. It just never stops does it? You get through one thing and something else just pops up.
Dad's back in hospital. Exeter this time. It was suppose to be routine but has turned out to be more complicated. So now he's not coming out till Tuesday.
Jamie had his consultation with his neurosurgeon yesterday in Plymouth. He was running and hour and a half late! Still at least they have decided to finally go ahead with the shunt now. They have been humming and haring for three years about this. So one hurdle might be crossed at last.
We're going to have to call his sleep councilor in again. He's gone back to more bad nights than good. We've just had a 2.30am followed by a 4.30am.
The silly season is kicking in now and Richard has started dashing about all over the place already. I keep telling him to slow down and not cart all those heavy laundry bags around. But will he listen? So I'm bracing for another heart attack.

Then last night one of my mums oldest friends called. She's kind of a third aunt, I've known her all my life. She's lovely. And she called to say she also had cancer. And because mum's at Exeter with dad guess who's going to have to tell her the news?

I've decided that trying to be happy is just too painful. Every time I try someone pulls the rug out again. I'd rather spend my life already sitting on the floor. Then, at least, when that rug starts to go I won't get any broken bones, just a couple of extra splinters.

Monday, 18 May 2009

I'm regressing!




As you have been able to see from my side bar I am currently reading 'Twilight'. Now this is not at all the sort of thing I would normally read at all. But mum came home with it from the mobile library. I saw it on her table and asked why she had chosen it, it's not her sort of thing either, apart from anything else she's 70. She said the man on the van had recommended it so she took it.

Now I have twin God daughters who are 15 and they are very into the twilight series so I had heard of it. I decided that, seeing as it was just sitting there I'd borrow it and have a read, see what all the fuss is about.



And I'm totally hooked! Not least because of Edward Cullen, oh my! Now I know he's a 17 year old vampire and I'm a wrong side of 30 housewife. But a girl can dream. It is rare that a character in a book does anything for me, it has only happened once before.

Maybe I'm just going backwards. In my defence I am, an will forever be, 16 in my head.

It looks like Richard Hammond may have a rival for my affections!

On the Jamie front. Well I have now had three night with little or no sleep. I have reached the slightly lightheaded stage now. Which may explain why vampires have become so appealing!

Thursday, 14 May 2009

IPod part two.

Ok then here we go. First of all thank you to everyone who responded to my little Q&A post. I stupidly thought that everyone had IPods these days. In fact I thought I had come rather late to the phenomena. I treated myself to a little IPod Shuffle last year (£32 in comet so not a big posh one or anything).





Anyway seeing as you answered my questions I suppose I should now own up to what I have lurking.



What is the most played song on my IPod? Moonlight Shadow by Mike Oldfield.



What song has the most meaning and why? Take on Me by A-ha. This song quite literally saved my life once.



What is the most embarrassing thing on on my IPod? Tragedy by Steps. In my defence there is also some Blondie, Simon and Garfunkel, Moody Blues, Enya and Clannad.



What song gets me singing along? Holding out for a Hero by Bonnie Tyler. But I have to have the volume up high enough so I can't hear myself.



When do I listen to it most? Doing changeovers. Takes my mind off the fact that I'm cleaning other peoples toilets!!

Monday, 11 May 2009

My IPod is psychic.

I was reading something the other day and this guy was talking about his IPod being haunted. He said that he always had it on shuffle but it always seemed to know just what song he wanted to listen to. I was nodding the whole time I read this because mine does that as well.

I always have it on shuffle but it is defiantly psychic. If I think I'd like to hear a certain song next, then that tends to be the one that comes up. it has it's off days, but is mostly spot on. It is a little creepy to be honest. Mind you it saves having to skip through everything to find what it is you want.

And this put an idea in my head for a new meme. So here are a few questions for you.

What's the most played song on your IPod?

Which song has the most meaning and why?

What is the most embarrassing thing on you IPod?

Which is your favorite to sing along to?

When do you most listen to it?

So there you are, over to you. I will put my own answers in the next post.

Saturday, 9 May 2009

Don't think I wanted to know that!

It is well known that holidaymakers leave their common sense, manners, road sense and ability to tell the time at home. But now it seems they have also started to leave their inhibitions and sense of shame there also.

You will remember the young couple in the swimming pool the other week, not swimming. Never mind that it was a pool that was open to anyone else staying there, as well as being visible to anyone walking past. They didn't care who might see them (not even her parents who were staying there as well).

You may also remember the tale of the businessman with his 'buy one get one free' Thai sisters, and the sheets that had to be binned after their visit.?

Well they've been at it again.

She was in her 50's and he in his early 30's by the look of them. Now I'm in no position to comment on age differences as you know. Richard is old enough to be my father and my step-son (who I've never met) is the same age as me. So good for them, why not if it works? And it obviously did.

I don't do this particular cottage because it's a Friday changeover and I do another one in a different place. But Richard came home and said that they obviously had a very good week. In his words there was 'evidence of a lot of sexual activity. And not just on the bed.'
'Oh?' says I. 'Where else then?'
'The bath.'
Ok fair enough, we've probably all been there.
'And the living room mirror.' Pardon?!?

Ok too much information. I really don't want to know how they managed to get 'it' over the living room mirror.

Thursday, 7 May 2009

My son has a haream!

It seems our five year old son is already pulling the ladies. I think there must be a flirt gene inherited from his father. Richard still has the ability to make grown women go all unnecessary. It's quite funny to watch actually. He's completely unaware he's doing it, most of the time. And so is Jamie.

At school most of the teachers and TA's are female. And in the morning they actually fight to get to him, to be the one to have him for the day! He has no idea, I don't think.

And then on Saturday after swimming we stayed on to have lunch with Richard. One of the owners of one of the cottages was there doing some laundry. She's never had children and fell for Jamie right away. By the time we went home they were on the floor together feeding her dog bits of biscuits. This was after we had met one of the couples staying in another cottage. They are a great old couple with a little Westie dog. Anyway she went all gooey over Jamie, who just stood there stimming, completely unaware of the fuss he was creating.

The trouble is that none of these adoring women are around at three in the morning when he decides it's time to get up. I was stupid enough to think that a couple of weeks of reasonable sleep patterns meant a break through. Oh No! Stupid, stupid mummy! In three days he has woken at 2.30am, 4.30am and 3.10am (this morning). I can cope with it, normally. Unless daddy decides to stick his nose in. Jamie finally went back to sleep this morning about 5ish. Richard went to the bathroom just before 6 and decided to look in on him. He was asleep on the floor with his face pressed against the wardrobe. Not the most comfortable position granted. But rather than let sleeping children lie Richard decided to move him back to bed! This was after he had slept through all the earlier fuss. And I knew he would go right back to sleep, leaving me to deal with Jamie when he woke back up. I could have slapped him! Luckily for him Jamie didn't wake. In fact I had to wake him to get him ready for school.

Why do men always think they know better?

Saturday, 2 May 2009

Being invisable.

Maria asked me today at swimming if I was going to post anymore about the weird and wonderful ways of our holidaymakers. As we were using the pool on the site where most of our cottages are it reminded me of the tale Richard came home with the other night.

The pool is indoors and along one side is a corridor that leads from the laundry room to the store room where we keep everything we don't keep in the laundry room. So Richard is back and forth all day when he's there. This corridor looks into the pool through three windows and two glass doors. So as you pass you can clearly see in.

The site is quiet this week and so the pool had been to. However one cottage is being used by the owners and their daughter. And the daughter's boyfriend. I think you can see where this is going.

Richard was going back and forth and was aware of activity in the pool. Because the pool is unmanned he always looks in to make sure whoever is in there is ok. Just a glance through the window. However what greeted him yesterday was the daughter and her boyfriend in the pool, in the top corner NOT swimming.

All I can say is thank God the pool gets cleaned on a Saturday morning before we all piled in with the kids!!!!

Friday, 1 May 2009

He said Rabbits!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Last night we were sitting watching the close of the news and the opening of the One Show. Jamie loves the intro music, and it marks bedtime.

The news finished and the ident thing came on while the announcer introduced the One Show. It was the ident with the forest and fairies. And there is a large rabbit, actually I think it's a hare. Anyway Jamie was watching when he turned to me and signed rabbit!!!! He has never done that before! He rarely signs spontaneously like that. He can sign to ask for some things, or if we deny him something until he signs. But this was just out of the blue. I was so excited. And so proud of him.

The only thing I can think is that they were doing something about the Easter bunny at school or something. We haven't go a pet rabbit or anything so it's not a sign I use that often with him. But he's remembered it, wherever he saw it.

Tuesday, 28 April 2009

Jamie where art thou??

As you know from a few blogs back we had a bit of trouble with some water coming into the wall in Jamie's room. So we pulled the bed away from the wall about a foot and put the bed rails up. He seemed to take no notice of this at all, we thought. Then, the other morning, he started knocking on the wall rather than the door as usual. When I went in I found him standing behind his bed by the wall, stuck. He'd got himself there but couldn't get back. So I heaved him over the rails back onto the bed. Fine, no harm done, he had only been there a few minuets.


Then on Monday the alarm went off and it was still all quiet. Usually he has me up long before the alarm at 7.30. So I went to wake him to get ready for school. I opened the door, walked in, no Jamie. Small amount of panic until reality kicked in. There is no way he can get out of his room as it's a door knob rather that a handle and he hasn't worked that one out yet. Anyway our room is right next door so he couldn't have gotten out without passing our open door. Anyway the door was still shut so he hadn't gone anywhere. But the fact remained the bed was empty and he was nowhere in sight. But I could hear him snoring.


Somehow he had got between the bed and the wall and had gone to sleep on the floor, with Pooh Bear as a pillow. He hadn't made any attempt to alert us that he was stuck. He is so accepting of everything that he didn't try to wake us. Most kids would have got upset and cried or something. But Jamie just curled himself up on the floor and went to sleep. I don't know if this is an autistic thing or just a Jamie thing. It worries me sometimes just hoe accepting he is. When he's ill or even when he broke his finger, he just seems to shrug and carry on.


Dad update. He's in hospital right now having his second lot of chemo. He seems ok, but is now starting to loose his hair. Keeping everything crossed.

Tuesday, 21 April 2009

Synopsis for Fiona.

A few weeks ago Fiona asked for other writers to post their synopsis. I thought this was a good idea because we know what happened and what's going to happen in our novels, but no one else does.

So this is the synopsis for Digging for Victoria. Please be honest, if it's crap or makes no sense then tell me. I need to get it right before I start subbing.


Synopsis for
Digging For Victoria.

When Fiona, Larissa and Izzie get to the top of the waiting list for the Long Meadow allotments they think they are just going to grow a few vegetables. In fact they grow much more. They grow friendships that will last a lifetime and other relationships they never thought possible. When they go into battle with the council over a proposed housing estate to be built on the allotments; when Fiona discovers her husband has been having a long term affair; and when Izzie discovers Oliver has left her with more than a broken heart the three women find they have more in common than they thought.

Because they really could’t be more different. Fiona has longed for a baby for longer than she can remember, and has lost more than she wants to count. Perhaps she should have done something with that law degree after all. Larissa loves everything that is pleasurable in life except love itself. She is never, ever going to get tied down. Until she meets Noah. But Noah is hung up on Izzie, who is hung up on Oliver. When Oliver left Izzie for America she was sure she would die. She soon discoverers she isn’t going to die, she’s going to have a baby.
Several sticks get grabbed by the wrong end.

Then there’s Connor Spence. He’s the man from the council, and the enemy to the allotments. But he has the most beautiful eyes Fiona has ever seen. They discover they hate each other in a way that means they can only ever end up in bed. And when Oliver turns up again things are set to become very complicated for all concerned.

Monday, 20 April 2009

Nobody loves me, sniff :0(

Nobody wants to play Pay it Forward with me! I only asked for three of you. I promise good pressies, honest. It's pathetic, no one has had to beg for players before. The cold's gone now and I did wash this morning, so it's safe to come near me.



Except that I look like a post box! We went to New Mills farm park near Launceston. We went with Little Rays of Sunshine (of which I am now Secretary apparently). The kids had a great time. Jamie loved the trampoline and the sand pit. I would show you the photos only I took them on the phone and I can't get it to transfer them to the computer !!!! Anyway it was a fantastic day so the kids were all smothered in sun cream. Trouble was I didn't do the same for myself. Now I know I'm blond (very sometimes) but I never used to take the sun, at all. I could lay in it for hours and nothing. But since I had Jamie I seem to have become prone to tanning, and burning. The trouble is there haven't been enough good summers in the last five years for me to remember this. So yesterday I came home lobster like. The bath was bloody agony this morning. I was glad I didn't have to face the great British public today, my face got quite a dose. My arms are the worst. Note to self, long sleeved tops!

Friday, 17 April 2009

Pay it Forward


Yesterday the postman bought be a jiffy bag from the lovely DJ Kirkby. This was my Pay it Forward girt from her. As you can see it was two great books and a copy of 'Shrek Rap'. The books are 'Ideas Above Their Stations' by various writers and 'Music of Maninjau' by David Green. They both look like good reads and I'm looking forward to them.
So now it's over to you. I expect you all know the Pat it Forward rules by now. The first three people to contact me on my comments page to say they want to receive a gift from me will be my Pay it Forward recipients. You won't owe me anything but you have to agree to Pay it Forward to three other bloggers when you get you gifts. So I'll wait to hear from you.
It seems I got the wrong end of the stick about autism and facial recognition. I can't remember where we got the idea that autistic people struggle to recognise faces. I know about the struggle to recognise expressions and emotins, I guess I assumed that meant faces in general. Saying that Jamie knows when we're smiling, and will smile back. And, when he was little, he would come up and touch my face when I was crying (bad post natal depression). But he either can't (or won't) acknowledge a cross or angry expression. Can this change? Can we 'teach' him to recognise emotion?
By the way Fiona I will post the synopsis for DV in the next day or two. I'd like the feedback.