Saturday, 28 November 2009

I'm back! I think!!

I think I might be back. TF promised free chocolate so how could I stay away?
I'm sorry I have been a bad blogger of late. I've kind of got sucked into other things, Face Book and Twitter to name but two. And I have been writing, not my new novel, but still words on page.

So a brief catch up. What has happened to Mrs P recently? Well I MET ROBERT PATTINSON!!!! Sqweeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!! But you all know that.

I have to say that anyone who actually knows me in person will tell you I have changed A LOT over the summer.

As most of you know my lovely dad was diagnosed with cancer on my birthday back in Feb. My 35th will never be forgotten anyway! And as you all know I kind of imploded there for a while. You were all so patient and kind and I do thank you.

I can pin point the change. It was the weekend on my BFF's hen do in early July. It was also the same week that dad went into hospital for his make or break op. I met a great group of girls that weekend who gave me permission to be me, if you know what I mean? I realised that for too long I had been trying to be who everyone else thought I should be. Perfect mother, wife, daughter, and I'd never just been me. Then, for three days, I was just me, and it was bloody fantastic!!

I had also just read the Twilight saga books, as you all know I devoured them at speed! At the hen weekend I found two like minded souls and decided to 'come out' as a Twilighter.

When I met up with the same crowed a few weeks later at Hev's wedding I knew that I wasn't going home as the same person. It was like a cloud had been lifted, revealing the real me.

Some of the changes are subtle. I seem to have gone back to wearing a lot of black, and I paint my nails now (black). And some more...obvious. I've lost nearly two stone, dropped nearly two dress sizes and got two tattoo's. I think getting the tattoo's and losing the weight finally shifted me into my new self.

Again those who have known me a long time will know that I have always wanted a tattoo, but they were the sorts of things other people did. And I have never been happy with my size. But it was a good thing to hide behind. When I realised I didn't want to hide anymore I felt free enough to do it. I don't mind being looked at now, I used to hate it. I feel happy with myself for the first time ever.

And yes Twilight has played a large part in my transformation. It gave me a great escape when I really needed it. Not to mention finding Mr Pattinson. I have never gone potty over anyone before. Not like this anyway (ok Morten Harket when I was a kid, and you all know THAT story!!). I know some of you don't get it (yes DJ he did smell, he smelt wonderful, all hail the scruff!), but I'm very happy in my Rob bubble thank you.

My hubby Rich has been a little taken aback at these sudden changes in his wife, bless him. But not in a bad way. He's been telling me for years that I need to have more of a life of my own. Ok I may have taken it to extremes, but I always do!


Debs said...

Good for you! It sounds like you're having great fun and looking fab. x


Ms P, don't you be telling 'em about the free chocolate! ;-) Right Ms Gothic, I've saved you a front row seat. VIP seat! Be there Tuesday!

I'm soooooo pleased to read you been have a swell time. It warms the cockles of my 'eart. Good on you girl :-) TFx.

rainbowmummy said...

i really enjoyed this post GO YOU!!!

HelenMHunt said...

Sounds like you've been on a bit of a rollercoaster. Keep us updated on all your exploits x

Rebecca Isolde said...

I really know what you mean about Twilight having such an has on me too. Maybe its because the three central characters give us permission to feel emotion, and not feel we have to hide that we become connected to a deeper part of ourselves! can tell I've just been at the cinema can't you...for New Moon 2nd time around !!! :-) Its good to meet another twilighter !!

Annicles said...

Sounds like you needed that year to get your groove back. You can be all the "good" people in your life - wife, mother, daughter etc and have space for you too. Hurrah!

KatW said...

It is fantastic to read that you are so happy and growing in confidence. What a wonderful positive post.

Now it is about time we met up. How time has flown since our original try in the summer.

Very happy for you. Xx

Lane said...

Great to hear!

Did you take that photo? My daughter will be envious:-)

claire p said...

Lane- Yes I did! Spoke to him and everything, see last post ;;)

Carol said...

I am so pleased for you!! This post is just full of positivity it just jumps out the screen and now I'm grinning away on your behalf!!

It's not much fun when you feel like you've lost yourself...I went through that a few years ago before I met Chris so know how it feels.


C x

Blu said...

Liberation, fly like a bird!

DJ Kirkby said...

Hah! Love the little aside to me about my 'smelly' comment. It's always a nice treat to find a new blog post by you. xo

rainbowmummy said...

Write a best seller.

Best seller gets made into a movie.

Movie stars Rob.

You work with Rob.

There you go.

GameforYou said...


simson11 said...

Hi Rahina!
Like everybody I am running out time not out of ideas. It is so wonderful to paint outside, although it is sometimes very exhausting to capture the fleeting moment. Thanks!
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